For the past three weeks I’ve been responsible for 20 13 year old girls on my hallway as an RA as well as about 70 kids in the classes and workshops that I have taught. I’ve been getting 5-6 hours of sleep a night and working for essentially days on end without even lunch breaks. It has been nuts and crazy and difficult and awesome and so many other things. Some days and times I hate it, but for the most part, this place is pretty great.
It was really interesting to come here after Mudd. They talk about this as a place where everyone can be themselves and experiment and try new things. I’ve found that I can definitely experiment and try new things, check out my flaming mohawk and new found ability to jam as a violinist with my guitarist friends if you want proof of that, but I still miss the people at Mudd who allowed me to entirely be myself without any effort at all. I do feel close to my friends on staff but it’s just not the same as being at Mudd. They are so different from me. Which is good and bad. I love normal people, but I miss Mudd people. It’s kind of like the CMS water polo team. I loved hanging out with them because they reminded me that there is a normal world out there and that there are good things about it but I was always really happy that I got to go home to Mudd at the end of the day. Now though, I can’t go home to Mudd. There’s no safe space filled with 800 other people just like me. It’s strange after four years at a place where I feel completely at home with everyone on first meeting.
One of the saddest moments for me so far was when I was sad and I realized that James wouldn’t be crawling through my window within 5 minutes to fix everything. The great thing is that I can still call everyone and they still love me and care about me. It’s hard being out of the bubble but I think it’s good to get out in the real world a bit. It’s just a bit upsetting that I can’t go back.
When I was at Mudd, they told me that it would be the hardest thing I probably ever did in my life. Mudd was a crazy intense period of time in my life that nothing could ever match. Explo is super crazy, but it still just can’t compare. I’ve been getting so little sleep every night and I still feel human which is good, and much better than at Mudd. But Explo is intense in a sort of different way. I’m not as challenged mentally as when I was at Mudd and I realized yesterday that I really missed that challenge, in some weird twisted way. It’s a more physical and different type of mental challenge here. Chasing down kids and keeping their attention for your classes and workshops. It’s hard, but so very different.
I’ve found that I really love to teach. I was hoping that was what I would find and I’ve been pleasantly surprised that I do really enjoy it. It’s crazy and you change your plans on the fly as you run around the classroom trying to keep everything together. I teach a class called Junk Punks which is essentially building random things out of other random things. It’s awesome and fantastic but I joke that my class is both me and the kids running around with our hair literally on fire. My Projectile Pros class (read: teenagers launching things) is pretty much the same thing. I also found that I really love coaching water polo. It was the highlight of my three weeks so far. It was great to watch the kids improve so much so quickly! By the end they could almost play! Even if they never really learned to egg beat.
There has been drama and boys but the staff is totally awesome for the most part. I found a wonderful group of guys that is just fantastic to hang out with all the time. Sheldon is super cool and says he’s not good at guitar but totally is. He’s one of the few people I feel really comfortable with and so I’ve played violin with him while he plays guitar and it’s the best experience. Vinny is more quiet and a cool guy and Alex reminds me of my friend Richard, all about the macho and looks tough but is a total softie. We all chill by the lake or in the staff lounge or wherever on our 2 minutes off of time we get a week and it’s great. There’s also my co-RA (or just co) Sophia who is going into her junior year at Pomona. She’s awesome and I’m so happy I have her because she puts up with me. Izzy goes to school at Harvard and is super cool. Sydney and Hannah in supply are great for hanging out and gossiping. All of the staff at Dana Hall are priceless. I could go on for ages.
What I’m trying to say is that I’m happy and things are good. While I was writing this up, my new set of girls showed up and they are fantastic and I can’t wait for this next session to start!